Surrender

Surrender is a powerful aspect of healing. When we surrender we come to accept that we do not have control over most things, while simultaneously freeing up space + energy for new things + possibilities that may be more suitable for us. While surrender is often confused with resignation, the two are far from the same thing.

Resignation is a state of hopelessness, helplessness + disappointment which highlights feelings of failure, while surrender is an active, conscious choice, a decision rooted in the awareness that life is an unpredictable, uncontrollable journey.

Surrender is difficult because for many of us our default coping strategy, whilst in intense emotional pain, is resignation. It doesn’t help that surrender has gained a bad reputation and is often viewed as an admission of defeat~ which is the farthest thing from the truth. 

Surrender does not mean giving up or giving in. Surrender involves recognition that we have done all we can and that we cannot control the outcome. There is freedom in letting go of our need to control the situation. We invite the possibility of greater possibilities and a sense of serenity when we look at the broader picture.

The path of surrender is difficult because it requires us to go through a process of grief, courage, hope, faith, wisdom + trust. As we surrender, we acknowledge the strengths and limitations of ourselves and our situation. While the options and outcomes available to us may be less than desirable, we invite peace when we surrender control. 

To move away from the pain of disappointment  and move towards acceptance + surrender, we can approach life with Kindfulness and:

💕 Treat ourselves with compassion + gentleness

💕 Pay attention to self-talk ~ what we say + how we say it are strong indicators of whether we are in despair and headed towards resignation or in acceptance and on our way to surrender

💕 Look at ourselves + the circumstances we find ourselves in with awareness rather than judgment

💕Embrace our feelings and express them in safe ways

💞 Discover our strengths and use them to move forward

💕 Ask for help—others may point out options we did not see. Help may come in the form of counselling, classes, spiritual direction or a close friend

💞 Know you will be okay, that you are neither controlled by nor defined by the experience

💕 Approach disappointment with curiosity to seek out the message or lesson

Difficulties in life are inevitable and happen to all of us, yet our approach to withstanding difficulties influences our peace of mind, our sense of self + our overall outlook. Life offers opportunities in ways we cannot imagine. The gift of surrender invites freedom of choice + renewed strength (which emerges from a sense of empowerment). Letting go of the need to control sets us on the path of healing and hope as we prepare for the next chapter in our life story.