The Power of Language

Language is powerful. It is so very powerful. With it, we not only tell stories to others and express our desires and deepest darkest secrets, but we also tell ourselves stories about the world, and perhaps most importantly, stories about who we are, where we find ourselves in our lives and why we are the way we are. With language we piece together the isolated snapshots that comprise our life, and create a comprehensive masterpiece—the narrative of our existence.

I have always been fond of language, and of communicating through the spoken and written word. But, it wasn’t until I realized, through experience and deep reflection, the formidable power of language, to change our moods, our thoughts, our behaviours and our very being, that I gave language more mindful consideration.

Let’s begin by looking at how language influences our life, by considering the forms that language takes. There are three main categories: the spoken word, the written word and the words that remain unspoken but which can nonetheless be heard and felt by our minds, hearts and spirits.

The words we speak into the the world, as well as those we hear, are largely a function of who we spend time around, and the music, TV shows, movies and radio chatter we tune into (as well as how much of it we expose ourselves to). In our rapidly digitizing world, we are more likely to hear voices that are unfamiliar to us than the sounds of those whom we love and hold dearest to our heart. Whose voice is the first one you hear when you wake up? Whose voice is the last one you hear before you fall asleep at night? What topics, ideas, issues and non-issues do you pre-occupy yourself with in between these two bookends of your day? And, how do these voices and sounds make you feel about yourself? What do they tell you about yourself and teach you about yourself and life?

So many of us listen to music, watch shows and tune in to the radio without ever questioning the impact that these exposures and the ideas they contain have on us and on our well-being. One simple way to know more about the impact of the words you hear is to really hear them, rather than simply letting them serve as a distraction, because while your conscious mind may not be absorbing every word, your subconscious mind is soaking in all the ideas, enabling them to inevitably affect more of your life than you are even aware of. 

The words we speak, by extension, are a culmination of the words we hear and have heard throughout our lives, which give life to ideas that comprise our thoughts and that we hold about ourselves and the world we live in. Whether we surround ourselves with joy and optimism, or with doom and pessimism, has been found to significantly impact the very words we speak, as well as the fabric of those words and truths which we may not speak but which we convey nonetheless—through our body language and very existence.

Once I took inventory of the words comprising the story of my life, I learned to value the sound of silence a lot more, and began to notice the impact that quiet had on my mind. Where I previously felt the need to constantly be distracted by background noise, once I became comfortable with stillness I noticed the same quality developing within my very own mind.

Now let’s consider the written word and what we read. Many of us read the newspaper first thing in the morning— I know that I was definitely amongst those who felt the need to know what was going on in the world around me, and especially in my own neighbourhood. I was obviously not oblivious to the impact of reading about murders, wars and other crimes and atrocities, because I would make an effort to avoid these headlines and only stick to skimming the weather and financial news (until later in the day anyways), but the bold titles and pictures jumped out at me nonetheless and managed to have a dampening effect on my mood and well-being.

A couple of years ago, I stopped looking at the newspaper first thing in the morning. Less than a year later, I stopped subscribing to the newspaper altogether. Now, I only consult the news on an as needed basis. I even deleted the news apps off my devices to ensure that boredom or curiosity would not send me on a detour! While I am by no means suggesting that you do the same, I am encouraging you to be conscious and aware of the impact reading the newspaper and consuming the news has on you.

After all, news outlets are not only owned by a few very powerful corporations, meaning most media has very few uniquely expressed ideas to offer, but they are a part of a larger business, and like any business, the bottom line is profit and more profit. Newspapers and magazines write about whatever will sell the most papers and magazines and this usually means they capitalize off of what gets the biggest rise out of us. It is not just about what they report, but how they report it. Although I sometimes find myself curious about what is going on around me, I am picky and particular about the sources I consult, so that I can avoid getting sucked into over-sensationalized or overly biased stores. 

I am also very cautious about the books I read and the social media I consume, because these outlets are oftentimes just alternate sources of the same dire and monolithic perspectives. If a book or post is not adding value to my life, by inspiring me or educating me, than they are just keeping me small and I decided a long time ago that I don’t have time to stay or play small!

As far as the weather is concerned—I keep an umbrella, a sweater, a jacket and a t-shirt in my car at all times so that I am ready and prepared to deal with the day, no matter what comes my way!

Which brings us to the most ubiquitous and sneaky form of language— the voice of our inner critic. Each and every one one of us has an inner voice, that commentator in our minds that feels the need to share its opinions about anything and everything!

I would argue that the power of language is most profound and pronounced within ourselves. How many times a day does a voice pop up inside your head to question your competence, to criticize your greatest efforts and/or to ridicule you after you finally mustered the courage to overcome your greatest fears and worries? How many times a day does that same voice keep you from living the life you dream of, out of worry that you will not be fast enough, smart enough, beautiful enough, simply just good enough to do that which you know you need to, in order to narrow the gap between who and where you are, and who and where you want to be?

We all have an inner critic, and that is normal. What is not normal or healthy is for our inner critic to hog the microphone and to keep us from taking healthy risks which are not only important but necessary in life, to grow, to improve and to reach the goals we set for ourselves.

It is important to note that our inner critic is not us, it is the sum total of all the ideas, beliefs, thoughts and attitudes we have heard or experienced about ourselves and our value, as well as our aptitudes and abilities. 

While many of us hear this voice and take what it says as fact, I have found personally and professionally that it can be much more helpful to take a deeper look at what it says. By digging deeper into its criticism and questioning it, we can understand its fears and what it hopes to help us achieve by reminding us of our shortcomings and anxieties.

This is the work of self-reflection, this is the inner work that allows us to turn our fears into victories, our weaknesses into our strengths and our inner voice into a compassionate helper. 

I will conclude this article by making note of the obvious: language is not only powerful when it is heard, read or spoken, but also and especially when it brings to light and life that which we would otherwise only harbour deep inside. Words bring our greatest ideas as well as our deepest and darkest truths to life. For this reason, language is clearly one of the most powerful tools and superpowers available to humans. We can choose to use this force constructively, by sharing words of positivity and encouragement, or destructively, by using words of despair. Just as words have the energy and power to help, heal and humble, they can also hinder, hurt, harm, and humiliate. Choose the words you hear, read and speak wisely, for they not only create our inner world, but eventually also manifest into our outer world. 

As I sit here editing this Blog Post, I cannot help but think of following-up with a Part 2, so that I can focus on our critical inner voice and how we can turn it into a compassionate coach. If this would be helpful for you, please comment below and I will make sure to put my ideas together so that those of you who are interested in doing this work have some guidance on how to proceed!